Anger …. or Frustration?
Imagine waking up tomorrow and getting ready for work. As soon as the alarm radio goes off, you sense something isn’t right. You can’t understand the language the DJ is speaking. Turning from station to station gets the same results….. they all seem to be speaking in a strange language.
You pick up the phone and call a loved one to see if they’re experiencing the same thing on their radio. The voice that answers at the other end of the line sounds like your sister……. But the language she is speaking is the same as you are hearing on the radio. You don’t understand a word she’s saying. After a few moments you hang up the phone in frustration.
You quickly get ready for work, worrying what’s happening to you. ‘What’s going on? Why can’t anyone understand me?’
The problem gets worse when you arrive at your job. The receptionist smiles at you and says….. who knows what? The same garbled unintelligible language comes out of her mouth. You ask if she can understand you, and her face quickly becomes worried. She can’t.
This goes on and on throughout the day, each person you come in contact with doesn’t understand you, and you don’t understand them. A few hours later your boss comes to your office, accompanied by two medical attendants. They continue to speak in their foreign language as they strap you into a stretcher and take you to the hospital.
Not a good day for you, am I right?
We all want need to be understood, and we use language as a key component of communication.
When a person feels they aren’t being understood, they begin to get frustrated. This frustration is often mistakenly called “Anger” by those around her/him.
In the example above, you would become angry, louder, agitated, and frustrated with your inability to understand and be understood by others. This frustration can be seen in people of every age when they feel they aren’t being understood. A small child will say the four words they know and get angry when the adult they’re talking to can’t understand them. The adult needs more words to understand, but the child can’t provide them. Both people are frustrated, and they will likely appear angry to each other.
An adult will make a statement that makes perfect sense to them, but the person they’re talking to understands the sentence differently. No matter how hard the two try, they can’t get the other to see their point of view. Voices get louder, tempers get shorter, frustration ensues, and they likely both believe the other person is angry.
The ability to understand another person and make them feel understood, will usually ‘calm them down’ and they will rate their experience with you as positive.
Empathy, the ability to ask questions, and the ability to communicate will enable a person to do this.
Angry and Frustration can both display the same outward signs (body language, level of voice, apparent agitation, etc.)
Angry people appear to attack others, but I think frustrated people want help.
When an angry customer approaches me I don’t think of them as angry. I say to myself, “This person is frustrated and feels that I can help them in some way. Let’s see if I’m able to understand them so that I can assist in solving their frustration.”
It’s easier to help a frustrated person. An angry person can be much more difficult.
Question: “What does it matter if I call them angry or frustrated, just so long as I help them?”
Answer: Generally we don’t like angry people. On the other hand, we can try to be patient and help people who are frustrated.
If you’re involved in Customer Service (and you are!) which type of person would you rather interact with?
Angry people all day long?
Or
Frustrated people all day long who are just looking for some help?
That next customer with a frown on his face, throwing his arms in the air, marching forcefully towards you as his brows scrunched up, and taking a big breath to bellow out why he has to return his product……… isn’t angry.
He’s just frustrated.
Please help him.
The Preferral
OK I have never heard this term before and it’s my belief that I’m introducing something for the first time. But likely that’s not true, since there are almost no original thoughts (just recycled ideas presented differently). So if someone has already come up with this term and definition please let me know and I will happily give you credit.
A Referral; I sell a product to you for 10$. You are happy with my company and the product so I ask you if you have any friends that might like to buy my product. You happily say yes and give me the name of a friend. When that person buys it is because you have referred them to my product.
I’ve obtained referral business and made twice the money without expending the same effort and resources to get the second sale. Referral business is very lucrative. It’s also a win/win situation. The company gets more business and the friend gets to introduce someone they care about to a great product.
A Preferral; I sell product to you for 10$ and are pleased to do so. I sell 5 products and you only buy 1 of them. So I ask you if you happen to buy any of the other 4 products from another source. “Yes,” you reply, “You buy three of the other 4 products from other sources. You had no idea until right now that you could get them from me.” You are very happy with my service and product, so you agree to buy the other products from me as well.
You are giving me Preferral business. There are big benefits to both the customer and the supplier when it comes to Preferral business.
Because you are now buying 4 products from me, I can give you a better price on shipping and volume, so you pay less getting all 4 products from me.
My benefit is that I have one customer, (who I have spent the time and energy to sell to for the first product……. This is the expensive part of sales.) buying three more products from me.
Here’s a sad story about not taking advantage of the Preferral;
I had a client that sold two products. Lets say they sold 10 million dollars of product A and 2 million dollars of product B. Product B was actually used more (by a ratio of 3:1). So while this company felt they were doing really well by selling 12 million dollars a year, in actual fact some competitor was selling 28 million dollars worth of product B.
If they had worked a little harder on getting some Preferral business, they could have enjoyed much larger sales.
Customer Service and the Intangibles….
My sister used to liberally add salt to all of her food. I would joke with her that she was going to break her arm from shaking the salt shaker so much.
She would smile and say “Hey, If you can’t see the salt…..it’s not really there!”
Managers feel much the same about their businesses. If you can’t clearly and accurately measure (see) a result, then in their opinion it doesn’t matter.
So how do you calculate the true cost of bad customer service?
ooh that’s a tough one. Different for every business. Too subjective.
Let’s just call it an intangible and accept that while there is a cost …… it is acceptable and we can just build it into the cost of our products and services. Let’s say we add an extra 5% to the cost of our stuff to account for bad customer service costs.
Sound good? well that’s what many do. But the costs can really be much more than that.
You don’t have to be able to see the salt on your roasted chicken in order for it to kill you over time.
Even if you can’t see it…… it’s still there.
Here is a very good post I stumbled upon that details The Cost of Delivering Bad Customer Service
If anyone else has more examples please send them to me.
Regardless of how well or poorly your business is doing, you can improve by accepting that bad customer service is costing you……. significantly.
GM took all our cash and learned nothing…..big surprise
Went to look at a new car today. ” GM needs help right?” I thought to myself. ” Maybe I should go take a look at what they have to offer.”
I strolled around the lot for 15 minutes. No one came out to help me.
I went inside. walked around for 5 more minutes. No one offered to help me.
I could go on and on….. but that would be putting more thought and energy into it than GM actually seems to be investing themselves.
Likely the big dogs are sitting in their offices scratching their heads and wondering why things are not getting better (or worse, they are grasping at numbers and reports and viewing them as actually positive)
All they have to do is shop for a car, they can see the problems in about 20 minutes.
But they won’t ….. because they can’t.
I’m Too Poor to Buy Cheap ……
A very good friend of mine grew up in a Polish/Russian community when he was young. Many of them were not rich immigrants and had to make each dollar count.
Today he shared a popular mindset among his community. “We’re too poor to buy cheap quality products.”
He tells me a story of his parents going not to the economical furniture store like most people then….. but they went to the more expensive store. They purchased what seemed to many a very expensive couch set.
30 years later, as most people were buying their 4th new set of furniture…… that same expensive couch set was sitting in my friend’s living room.
In the age of Walmart where you buy cheap from a big pile….. then go re-buy when it wears out, We have forgotten the savings of buying expensive.
We buy a cheap product for $0.90 instead of $2.oo. But we buy three of them before the more expensive product even starts to look hagard.
Steve reminded me today that many of the large number 1 companies are modelled after Walmart.
If you could remind consumers about the benefits of quality….. your product might not be looked at as a commodity.
Empathy…. You need this to give great customer service
The ability to sense and understand understand someone’s emotions as if they were your own is a crucial requirement for providing great customer service.
I saw a 4 year old boy demonstrate this ;
He was playing with another child. The child wanted the boy’s toy. It was his favourite toy, his mother explained to the child’s parent. He had never shared this toy. The other child started to cry. With a concerned look, the little boy handed his favourite toy to the other child, who immediately began to smile. The little boy smiled at first, happy to have made the other child feel better. Seconds later he began to cry.
The little boy had done something that many people will never be able to do…. he had empathized with the other child and put her wants above his own.
That boy was a natural at customer service. He hadn’t read any customer service books, but he was able to make others happy, because he possessed empathy.
If You’ve never read Seth Godin…..
Then you really should ! I’ve heard about him for years, but never read or listened to a thing he had done.
A few weeks ago I decided that he is to marketing…. what I want to be to Customer Service.
So….. I started to read his books. I subscribed to his daily blog. I began to watch YouTube clips of him speaking.
I recommend you look him up. His ideas are excellent and easy to read.
What book first ? Free Prize Inside
And here’s an example of a great post from him …. subscribe to Seth Godin today !
So What’s Next?
You walk into your doctor’s office for a routine check up. You’ve done this many times before and don’t expect anything to go wrong.
Everything goes fine for the first few minutes. Then your doctor does something new. She wheels a large tray over in front of you and removes the covering to reveal many large, sharp, shiny, painful looking instruments. She doesn’t notice your eyes bulge because she’s looking at the various tools.
She nods to herself then turns to you and says, “Ok, I have a couple quick things to check in the next room and then I’ll return to finish with your examination.”
Once she leaves the room your eyes can’t help but fixate on the terrible looking utensils. You get very nervous and likely even scared , imagining what tool does what and how much pain it will cause you.
Every minute that the doctor is out of the room becomes more and more disturbing. What are these tools for ? Why haven’t you ever heard of this? Are you dying? Argghhh.
The doctor comes back in. If you’re still there, you blurt out your fears and misgivings about what comes next!
Imagine your relief when she laughs and says, “Oh these tools have nothing to do with you.”
After the relief passes, do you feel upset that the doctor unthinkingly put you through this needless torture? You should.
Every day customer service ( Everyone) people do the same thing.
People respond very well when you proactively tell them “What’s next.”
- I’ll put your order into our computer then be back with your drinks and salads in about 3 minutes.
- My sales visit with you is just to make sure the products you are currently buying work well for you.
- The blood test is painless and takes about 5 minutes…. we will have you on your way in no time.
- Our delivery person is in your area tomorrow morning and will drop by at 9:30….. 10 am at the latest.
- I received your quotation request. It will take me two hours to get something back to you, how does that sound?
- Our next step in the marketing process is to develop a group of 20 questions about your specific product….. I will contact you tomorrow morning to help compile the list with you.
Answering the question”What’s next?” helps the other person know what to expect.
If you leave it to their imagination…. it will almost always lead to a bad place.
Tweaks
Anthony Robbins often asks the question, “What if small was big, and big was small?”
Great question !
The smallest adjustments can produce very large results, given enough time.
- a seedling can grow into a tree …… in a rock !
- 100 extra calories a day can make you obese
- 100 less calories a day can allow you to lose weight
- greeting someone with a smile can lead to a pleasant interaction ( greeting them with a frown can certainly result in an unpleasant experience)
it goes on and on……..
Small changes are boring….. they aren’t sexy!
Here’s another great quote ( I think from Tony’s book Awaken the Giant Within)
“People tend to overestimate what they can accomplish in a short period of time……. and underestimate what they can accomplish over a longer period of time”
If you want to improve ….. most of what you are doing is good.
By tweaking something you do well, just a bit…… you can get amazing results.
A slight breeze on red coals ….. results in fire.
Tweak often.
On Being Consistent
Every business is consistent.
Is yours consistently good? or consistently bad?
Does yours strive to improve? or rest on it’s past accomplishments?
Your business….. Is it setting new goals? or shrugging it’s shoulders and pretending everything’s ok the way it is.
Do you know have a definite plan? or are you just blindly moving from meeting to meeting?
Consistent (aware) positive efforts lead to success.
Consistent confusion leads to failure.
Your business needs to get better at providing great customer service…… do you know how to ?
Looking at most businesses ……. the answer is no.
I wish I was wrong about this.
Customer Service is dying……
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